"How could you just leave me standing, Alone in a world so cold? Maybe you're just too demanding. Maybe I'm just like my father--too bold. Maybe you're just like my mother. She's never satisfied. Why do we scream at each other? This is what it sounds like, When doves cry." -- When Doves Cry.

I actually expected a good Christmas this year. Sometimes i'm just too gullible to believe in happiness being real. I think maybe because when i watch the movies and they show the happiness that a family can and should share, I sometimes fall and believe that my family can too possess that. someone needs to drill into my head that I'm ASIAN and that will never change.

I really want BobaCha. I have been deprived of it for FAR too long.

December 30th! Dakotas should be fun. A night away from the house and dancing too! I can't wait.

I keep reminding myself. Only 2 more years. I've lived through 16. Just two more years and I'll be gone. Just two more years and I can find out what life is. I don't think I've been sheltered. Whatever my parents tried to shelter me from, I went out and experienced it. The rest that comes with life I experienced at home. So maybe when I'm on my own, I'll find something real to allow me to believe that life does have meaning and that it doesn't have to be constantly an obligation.

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